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Serves Me Right for Giving General George S. Patton the Bathroom Key is the 250th episode of King of the Hill. It was first aired on April 26, 2009. The episode was written by Tim Croston and Chip Hall, and directed by Steve Robertson. Cotton's last wish was to be flushed, though in "Cotton's Plot", he was given a plot to be buried in. He was also cremated, despite the plot he earned from the episode.


In this episode, Didi Hill arrives with a box of Cotton's things and a note for Hank naming his as executor of his will. Hank learns that his father Cotton left him a list of his last requests, all of which are distasteful and embarrassing. Hank takes this responsibility very seriously. He begins to wonder at how little he knew of his father and tries to glean some information about Cotton as a person, though every detail he learns is sexual or otherwise embarrassing. The last request on the list is to give an item to Fatty (or, at least, "a Fatty" of the several men nicknamed that over Cotton's lifetime). Fatty Jr. tells them his dad died, then stomps on Hank's foot (a request from Cotton) and gives him a key to a locker.

Dale and Bill are too busy ending their friendship over a discarded beer can on Bill's lawn. They almost have to get a dude-vorce, but when they see how much Hank needs their help to fulfill Cotton's last wish, they decide to put their differences aside, and honor the man that killed "fiddy men."

The locker (#1942) contains a box and two notes: one for Fatty, and one for Hank if Fatty is dead. Inside the box is an urn of Cotton's ashes. Cotton's final wish is to be flushed down the same toilet that General George S. Patton used right before he was sent to WWII, which is at a military bar.

Unfortunately, the Chimney Pipe Bar & Social Club bartender is all too familiar with the issue of veterans requesting flushing at their bathroom, which clogs the pipes and requires $300 each time to fix. Bill distracts the bartender by starting an argument about which war was the toughest war amongst the patrons. Hank flushes his dad's ashes and carves his name in the wooden tank cabinet, noting that he learned the importance of the many friends Cotton had in his life.

Hank has to pay the $300. Peggy says to Hank that “Even in death, Cotton has found a way to cost them money and make Hank miserable.”

The episode ends with Hank talking to the audience about proper toilet use from the back of the mower. Hank explains that if we get our toilet clogged, we should consult the hardware store and get a professional plumber.


In the episode, there are many contradictions found with Cotton's requests with numerous episodes:

"Hank's Cowboy Movie":

  • Although Hank and Peggy's wedding video had them with several other guests present when they were cutting the cake (and a drunk Bill helping himself to several slices), the flashback in this episode (where Cotton tells the priest who married Hank and Peggy "I killed fitty men") depicts all but Cotton as absent, and him wearing a blue suit rather than the brown one he was shown to wear in the video.

"Cotton's Plot":

  • Although it is revealed Cotton never fought in Berlin or anywhere in Europe, Cotton's request was to deliver a fork he had "used" in Germany to Bill, which Hank implies it was probably used to kill someone.
  • Cotton's last wish was to be flushed, while in "Cotton's Plot", he was given a plot to be buried in. He was also cremated, despite the plot he earned from the episode.
  • It may be confusing that Fatty is said to have recently died, as Cotton talked of Fatty dying during World War II. (He was killed by sharks, after which Cotton used some of his corpse to kill Japanese soldiers. "I beat 'em all to death with a big piece of Fatty!") However, Cotton tends to reuse the nicknames "Stinky" and "Fatty" in all of his circles of friends. When naming the members of the VA club at least four of them had the name Stinky. Also, the list of dead shows two Fatties.
  • Cotton had a French lover, who also said that Cotton made love with her in France.

"Yankee Hankee":

  • Another major inconsistency is that Hank is shown born in a hospital ward, with Cotton flirting with a nurse. In the episode "Yankee Hankee", Tilly explains to Hank that she had no time to get to the hospital and consequently gave birth to Hank in the Women's bathroom at Yankee Stadium; additionally, Cotton was escaping capture after a failed assassination attempt on Castro (of course Tilly would've still had to see a doctor after giving birth. Although unlikely for many reasons it's not impossible to assume they waited until returning to Texas)

"My Own Private Rodeo":

  • Dale's father, Bug Gribble, is mentioned in the episode, but his boyfriend's name is revealed to be "Stephano". In the contradicting episode, his boyfriend's name was "Juan"; it is possible Bug may have broke up, but is unlikely. It's also possible that Juan and Stephano are the same person.

"Returning Japanese":

  • Cotton had made his peace with the Japanese and their leader in Returning Japanese (part 2), but he asks Hank to spit on the Japanese Embassy grounds. It's not entirely out of character for Cotton, though.


Stinger Quote

"I killed 50 men! (I killed fitty men!)" - Cotton Hill


  • The note that requests Hank to flush the ashes clearly does not mention about how it was a military tradition to flush one's ashes down Patton's toilet, as it only discussed about how Hank was to flush the ashes.


  • This is Didi Hill's final appearance where she reveals her new marriage to a wealthy professional wrestler.
  • According to Hank, it has been approximately a year since Death Picks Cotton.
  • When Kahn and Octavio help divvy up Dale and Bill's belongings during their fight with each other, among Dale's belongings, are seen a garden gnome presumably from Gnome on the Range, a garden gnome store located in New Hoffenscheim that appeared in the episode Yard, She Blows!, and there is also seen among Dale's belongings, a fetus alien in a jar which appeared in the episode Dream Weaver as well as the episode The Courtship of Joseph's Father.
  • When the military veterans begin arguing in the bar, the bartender tells them to remember the rules. A glimpse of a sign in the bar reveals that the three bar rules are: No smoking, No refunds on Ms. Pacman and No War Debates.
  • Among the military veterans inside the bar is a Vietnam veteran named Ronnie who had suffered post traumatic stress. This is his second appearance, his first appearance was in the episode "Unfortunate Son", and Jeter "The Beater" Turbeville, who is making his second appearance, his first appearance being in the episode "To Spank, with Love".
  • Among the scribbling on the walls inside the bathroom at the bar, is the following: "Brooklyn owes Cotton Hill one cigarette and a shot at his wife 2/14/1956" and "Fatty was here" and also "Platoon off to Japan 1943"
  • When Hank is carving Cotton's name onto the toilet which has been carved into a gravestone of sorts for veterans, the following names and dates are seen: Stinky - July 20, 1965 - Fatty - November 23, 1975 - Brooklyn - February 13, 1979 - Fatty - May 17, 1986 - Irwin Linker - October 7, 1991 - Topsy - June 5, 2002. All of which were friends and war buddies of Cotton.
  • This is the first episode since the early seasons to end with Hank breaking the fourth wall from the back of his mower.

Season 12 Season 13

Dia-BILL-ic Shock · Earthy Girls are Easy · Square-Footed Monster · Lost in MySpace · No Bobby Left Behind · A Bill Full of Dollars · Straight as an Arrow · Lucky See, Monkey Do · What Happens at the National Propane Gas Convention in Memphis Stays at the National Propane Gas Convention in Memphis · Master of Puppets · Bwah My Nose · Uncool Customer · Nancy Does Dallas · Born Again on the Fourth of July · Serves Me Right for Giving General George S. Patton the Bathroom Key · Bad News Bill · Manger Baby Einstein · Uh-oh, Canada · The Boy Can't Help It · The Honeymooners · Bill Gathers Moss · When Joseph Met Lori, and Made Out with Her in the Janitor's Closet · Just Another Manic Kahn-Day · To Sirloin With Love